Forever Alone

I understand what true pain is,
waking up without a soul;
existing forever, but always alone.

I know where sorrow is born,
In icy depths of mans empty heart;
his spirit of love to tear apart.

I see misery in every face,
knowing no mercy, nor joy, nor peace;
only death can bring them ease.

I hear loathing in every word,
every breath a burning pain;
lies, deceit, and wraths distain.

I feel hate inside mankind,
rotting filth, disease, decay;
in their defense, nothing to say.

I taste the rotting flesh of sin,
toxic putrescence, bitter and vile;
evil by nature, the mind of a child.

I am the truth in all that you feel,
my humanity stolen, compassion is gone;
I am that which you know is wrong.

-G.W. Mainhood

Push-ups and Yoga

How many push-ups can you do?
I can proudly say I did 67 non-stop.
Does anyone use the 100 Push-ups App on their iTouch? It's really useful to help build up arm strength.

Does anyone do yoga?
I know it sounds weird for a guy to do yoga, or so say my friends, but I find yoga a lot more challenging than what it originally seemed like.
I tried it out yesterday and I had quite a difficult time finishing the first 7 minutes of the instructional video. It really works out the muscles in your body that you don't use often.
Here's a link to anyone who is interesting in trying out yoga, its fun and don't be discourage by the fact that it looks weird.
http://www.yogatic.com/

Paper Cranes

I'm making a thousand paper cranes to have my wish come true. You should make one thousand too. ;]

Psychological Problems

My friend has this psychological problem and I've really been trying to help deal with it. However, I'm seriously stumped.Lets call my friend Andy.
Andy had two amazing friends, he was really happy since they were the best friends he could have. However, on his birthday, he ignored his friends and for two days afterwards, he ignored them as well. When he finally met up with them, his friends asked what happened and he said:
"F**k off"
The friendship broke and they completely ignored each other from then on.
In school, they completely ignore each other and are nearly on the point of hating each other.
My friend slowly developed a mental issue. He constantly thinks hes over weight, that he always hated his friends. He told me he wants friends, but he claims he knows he won't get any unless he becomes anorexic. Only then, would he get some friends who are only his friends out of sympathy. I've tried talking to him and told him it is his thoughts that are causing him to become worst. When he is home alone, he stuffs himself with lots of food (he's a pretty big eater), and then he goes to the bathroom and throws it all up, sometimes to the point where hes bleeding. His friends are rather forgiving people, is there anything I could say to them to my friend to help this case?


Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated. Really looking out for my friend here, wish there was something I could do to help.

Lucid Dreaming

Lucid dreaming is something that I've been trying to accomplish for a while now. I just keep getting sidetracked and my sleep pattern is messed up.
Here's a little guide for people who want to try as well, it could take from a week to a month to get it down properly. You don't lucid dream every time you sleep either. I've only had about 5 or 6 lucid dreams so far.

Surgery Postponed

The doctor wasn't there yesterday.
He apparently had family issues and had to leave the country.
My surgery is going to be postponed for either one to three weeks, depending on how long the doctor will be gone.

I also found this hilarious guy on youtube, his name is cr1tikal.
I don't play Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, nor do I play Xbox360 or PS3, but his videos always gets me to laugh, regardless of how bad of a mood I'm in. So yea, go check him out, channel links right here:
Cr1tikal (a.k.a. penguinz0)

Surgery

Hey guys, I'm getting my surgery for post-retina detachment fixes tomorrow. I won't be able to blog for a while.
My doctor says I have to get the leftover scar tissues blocking my vision removed.

On the other note, I found this amazing website with TONS of information waiting to make your life even better:
How To Be Better At Life
It has information on nearly every single topic you can come up with. Thirteen gigabytes worth of information right here in your hands.

YMCA

For those who don't go to YMCA, please go.
It's a non-profit organization trying to make people become more fit. ( You still have to pay for membership, unless you have a friend with guest passes, in that case you can just go when your friend and get guest passes.)
I went today, from 2-6.
2 hours of basketball (Yes, I can't get enough of basketball.)
1 hour of handball
20 minutes of swimming (We got kicked out, time was up)
15 minutes of working out
At least 20 minutes in the sauna, I swear I lost track of time and almost passed out.
I had a big meal afterwards, feeling great at the moment.
Going to go try some new things cause I have this feeling I can do anything right now.
Only bad thing today was that I lost my glasses, but my eye surgery is in 3 days so I guess that's not too big of a deal.

One Day in My Life

Four days of basketball practice so far. Absolute hell.
On the bright side...
I went on "date" with this cute girl today, we went to Times Square, Bryant Park, and Rockefeller Center.
We also went to Kinokuniya Bookstore, it's a nice Japanese bookstore with a Cafe on the second floor. I bought curry bread and plum onigiri. The curry bread tasted pretty bad, the onigiri was good though.
I used to think I watched a lot of anime, when I went to the mange/anime section of this store, I knew I was completely wrong. I guess I'm glad I stopped cause there is really no end to the amount of manga/anime a person can read/watch.
I really wanted to ask this girl to be my girlfriend, I've liked her for quite a while now.
In fact, I have so much fun when I'm around her I end up forgetting.
Today wasn't the case though, we ended up talking about her personal life. I really wanted to ask her but I felt that the situation wasn't right. Perhaps next time...
Just have to get the courage.

First day of basketball practice

I ended up coming home and getting a huge headache. Dropped straight to sleep.
Feeling much better now, but I barely got anything done today.
I was going to create my little stash, except I seriously... could not find glue.
Certain I'll get straight to sleep today, still really tired.
39 more days of practice left to go.
Happy 4th of July everyone.
Fireworks going crazy in New York right now.

How to make a hidden stash

Trying this once I get home tomorrow.
Going to take pictures and post on how it goes.

Sleep

Its 12:30am, fireworks booming outside. I shut the window pretty loudly and proceeded to continue sleeping, but I can't. I have to wake up in about four hours too... So...
I decided to get on my blog and write about it.
Anyone have tips on getting back to sleep?
Or procedures they have before they go to sleep that work quite well?
Any feedback would be appreciated.

Basketball Practice

Starting tomorrow, I am waking up at 5 everyday and proceeding with my little long distance running program as a warm-up before my basketball practice.
Basketball practice includes working on handling the ball better, shooting mid-range to long-range shots better, and learning to finish with my left hand at the hoop.
This summer, I have two choices.
Live or die.

Decision

I've decided, I'm going to go for the shy girl. My dream told me we would be happy together and dreams mean something.

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Grab a shovel. I'm one skull short of a Mouseketeer reunion. :: Leaguecraft

Grab a shovel. I'm one skull short of a Mouseketeer reunion. :: Leaguecraft

Niga geuwa datugo
Ttaeron geu ttaeme ulgo
Himdeureo hal ttaemyeon nan huimangeul neukkigo
Amudo moreuge mam a-a-apeugo
Nijageun misomyeon tto damdamhaejigo

Niga hoksina nae maeumeul alge doelkkabwa
Arabeorimyeon uri meoreojige doelkkabwa
Nan sumeul jug yeo
Tto ipsureul kkaemureo
Jebal geureul tteona naege ogil

Baby jebal geuui soneul japjima
Cuz you should be my Lady
Oraen sigan gidaryeo on nal dorabwajwo

Noraega ullimyeon ije neoneun
Geuwa pyeongsaengeul hamkkehajyo
Oneuri oji ankireul
Geureoke na maeil bam gidohaenneunde

Nega ibeun wedding dress
Nega ibeun wedding dress
Nega ibeun wedding dress

Nae mameul mollajwotdeon
Nega neomu miwoseo
Gakkeumeun nega bulhaenghagil nan baraesseo
Imi nae nunmureun da ma ma mareugo
Beoreutcheoreom honja neoege malhago
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/t/tae_yang/wedding_dress.html ]
Maeil bam geureoke buranhaetdeongeol bomyeon nan
Ireoke doelkkeoran geon aranneunjido molla
Nan nuneul gama
Kkeuchi eomneun kkumeul kkwo
Jebal geureul tteona naege ogil

Baby jebal geuui soneul japjima
Cuz you should be my Lady
Oraen sigan gidaryeo on nal dorabwajwo

Noraega ullimyeon ije neoneun
Geuwa pyeongsaengeul hamkkehajyo
Oneuri oji ankireul
Geureoke na maeil bam gidohaenneunde

Nega ibeun wedding dress
Nega ibeun wedding dress
Nega ibeun wedding dress

Budi geuwa haengbokhae
Neoreul ijeul su itge
Nae chorahaetdeon moseupdeureun da ijeojwo
Birok handonganeun
Na jugeul mankeum himi deulgetjiman no oh

Neomu oraen siganeul chakgak soge
Hollo babocheoreom saratjyo
Ajikdo nae geunyeoneun nal bogo
Sae hayake utgo inneunde

Nega ibeun wedding dress
Nega ibeun wedding dress
Nega ibeun wedding dress
Oh no!

Relationships

Ever so complicated...
There are two girls in my life right now. One talks to me nearly 5 to 6 hours a day and we always have fun, the other likes me behind my back, even though I found out. Both girls are amazing girls, but girl 1 is very easy to talk to, direct, straightforward, and outgoing. Girl 2 is shy, passive, and hard to talk to since shes always surrounded by her friends.
Who should I ask out?